Tuesday, December 10, 2013

bad day

Actually i don't want to call it a bad day. It's just not a good one. Which is really really bad.

High work loads. But i don't have enough speed and capability in catching up with my team members. I work slowly. And it makes everything get slower. Due to my lack of knowledge about what i'm doing herr. Abouy the tasks. About the data. About the analysis.

I have worked in this division for a month. Probably i have to get used to to their fast pace. But sadly i am not :(

Sometimes i feel like i'm so dumb that dont know anything, that have to learn and read so many things before i know a thing. So tired sometimes. And i really feel guilty about that.

In that moment when i want to cry so bad, when i need a shoulder to cry on, i realize that i have nobody :(
It even makes my day seem worse and worse :(

I really need a companion :(
So i know that i'm not alone. So i know that i have someone i can run to when i'm in these lowest point. So i know that i can be stronger because of his support.

10.52 pm, i'm even still at the office.
Stressed of these tasks, stressed of these loneliness. OMG i must be look like a loser....

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